File Under: Marriage, Ten Entire Years

Mr. FH and I recently celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary. It was a trifle surreal, actually, to come to the ten year point, as in some ways it feels like our wedding day was yesterday, a day which recalls numerous fond memories for me. We had a very understated civil ceremony at City Hall, then a short champagne reception given by the best man followed by our own cocktail party reception.

With so many of our guests and Mr. FH in the restaurant business, it was a given that we celebrated in two elegantly appointed restaurants in New York. There was nothing traditional about the ceremony or the receptions, but every detail suited us perfectly, which was all we cared about. For example, I wore a winter ivory suit which didn't top the bill for the wine we served at our reception, and we spent money on a lavish appetizer spread rather than a photographer or band.

Ten years together is an accomplishment of which I find myself quite proud. These years have not always been easy, but they have been challenging, surprising, peppered with adventures; a relationship graced by joy, touched by tears, and immensely satisfying for me.

As in every marriage, there were many occasions when I wasn't sure we'd survive into the next day, much less another year, and occasions when we were both hanging on by the slenderest of threads. We've learned the valleys of despair are a glimpse into the abyss and that the hills of exultation are indeed the highest.

As they say, the secret to a happy marriage is to never go to bed angry. Our secret is that it is much easier to do when one partner works days and the other nights (and you both get a bunch of time with the bed all to yourself).